How Long Is ‘Too Long’ In The Punishment Shack? Parenting Questions Answered
It’s a common conundrum that every modern parent has to deal with: how long can you send Junior to the Punishment Shack before the local child protection services start to sniff around and ask questions that you’d really rather not deal with again?
Fortunately, Manonizer has your back – if not in the legal aid sense, then at least from the ‘friendly advice about child-rearing’ perspective. The next time your son or daughter erases those DVR’d Big Bang Theory episodes, just follow these simple guidelines and you’ll be able to walk the line between Number One Dad and monster without having to bow to societal pressures and put a window in the Punishment Shack.
Is It Wintertime?
The Punishment Shack can get cold in the winter, but then again, the Punishment Shack was never meant to be Club Med. Fill the shack with fallen leaves, a plastic sheet, and one (but only one) mitten to allow your child to construct their own insulated shelter, of sorts. Alternatively: leave them alone with a favored household pet and a box cutter, and let them decide for themselves.
Is The Shack Physically Isolated?
Where did you build your Punishment Shack? Is it somewhere convenient like the backyard, or a place more likely to trigger remorse and rehabilitation, like an isolated island on a distant lake that is only reachable by air? One day on the lake is like a month near the safe shade of the homestead, so book your float plane charter accordingly.
Maybe The Shack Is Haunted?
If the Punishment Shack is located near or even on an old burial ground, Pet Sematary, or industrial waste dump, chances are your kid isn’t alone in there. Helpful spirits can help push a child back towards the light, but they can also drag them deeper into the world of time-outs and failing report cards. Get to know the entities inhabiting your Shack before deciding on the length of the sentence for maximum effect.